Katy Perry is in the midst of a “Big Brother”-style livestream, broadcasting her her entire weekend to the world (which you can watch above). For those watching on Friday night, things took an emotional turn when she engaged in a therapy session with Dr. Siri Sat Nam Singh, host of Viceland series “The Therapist”.
As MTV.com reports, Perry discussed her desire to live a more authentic life — which, she explained, hit home for her when she drew a card reading “authenticity” from a deck of inspirational Angel Cards after the release of her 2013 “Prism” album.
She also opened up about her dual personas, “Katy Perry, pop star” and “Katheryn Hudson,” a self-professed “dork.”
“I’m a bit more nerdy than everybody thinks I am, I’m a big goofball. The fantasy of Katheryn went into Katy and made this bigger than life personality,” she said, as reported by Australia’s News Corp. “That’s the point of this whole thing, if people can see I’m just like them then they can dream just as big,”
She also revealed that this dichotomy between these two sides of her personality is what led her to drastically change her hairstyle from long and dark to short and blonde. “I didn’t want to look like Katy Perry anymore,” she explained, adding that she had received a lot of negative comments about her new look on social media.
In addition, News Corp also reports that she broke into tears while opening up about past struggles with suicidal thoughts. “I wrote a song about it,” she admitted. “I feel ashamed that I would have those thoughts, feel that low and that depressed.”
She added: “You can be right or you can be loved. I just want to be loved.”
TMZ posted video of the emotional livestream moment:
Perry’s livestream will continue until Monday, with special guests including Gordon Ramsay, Neil DeGrasse Tyson, America Ferrera, RuPaul, Caityn Jenner and more scheduled to drop by throughout the weekend.