Evan Rachel Wood Looks Back At Her 20s, Realizes ‘I Very Easily Could Have Been Dead’

Evan Rachel Wood has just turned 30, and the “Westworld” star celebrates this milestone by writing a touching essay, looking back at her 20s and detailing the many lessons she learned during that pivotal decade in her life.

In the essay, which appears in Nylon, Wood marvels about the fact that she made it through her 20s intact.

“I can finally start looking back on my past with a smile on my face because it’s over and I survived,” she writes. “I very easily could have been dead in my 20s. I think a lot of people can relate to this. I did not think I would make it this far. So every second is a gift.”

She recalls those younger years as “a really intense time of metamorphosis, loss, love, trauma, and enlightenment. I traveled the world. Met more people than I can count. Sang with my heroes, fell deeply in love, moved across the country — twice. Was engaged to Marilyn Manson. (Remember that? That was weird.) Did well in my career. Earned enough money to live comfortably.”

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She doesn’t gloss over the more traumatic moments from her past, writing: “I was also preyed upon, taken advantage of, lied to, raped twice on two separate occasions, forgot who I was for a while, attempted suicide… twice, been through many different kinds of intense therapy, held secrets in for years till I collapsed, came out of the closet, got married, had a baby at home, got divorced, wrote and recorded an album, lost two grandparents, gained two siblings, played the most inspiring role I have had the pleasure of inhabiting, and finally started writing,” she adds.

Admitting that “there hasn’t been a dull moment,” she describes her 20s as “a wonderful nightmare” in which her “limits have been tested in many ways, and I learned I am much stronger than I ever thought possible.”

Out of all the lessons she learned, she writes, “The greatest lesson I have learned is that there is always more to learn.”

You can read Wood’s piece in its entirety right here.

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