Danielle Fishel’s first few weeks as a mother did not go as planned, and now the “Boy Meets Girl” star is getting real about mom guilt.
In a personal essay penned for “Good Morning America“, the actress is opening up about the difficulties she faced after giving birth to her baby boy, Adler.
“Naively, and perhaps arrogantly, I thought, ‘I’ll never let myself have mom guilt’. Then I had a baby,” she wrote.
RELATED: Danielle Fishel Reveals Premature Son Adler Is Finally Headed Home
Adler was born four weeks early with fluid in his lungs, meaning that Fishel could not give birth naturally, as she planned. Her son also could not drink breast milk until a few months after birth and had to remain in the neonatal intensive care unit at Children’s Hospital Los Angeles for three weeks.
“My drug-free birth was out the window. The guilty thoughts came flooding into my head: ‘Why did my water break so early? Was it because I was on my feet working 12-plus hour days at almost 36 weeks? Was it all the spicy food I had been craving? Did I do something that will hurt my baby?'” Fishel shared in her essay.
RELATED: Danielle Fishel Details ‘Nightmare’ Delivery After Welcoming Son Adler 4 Weeks Early
Now working as a director as well, Fishel went on to talk about going back to work following Adler’s health issues.
“I came home after being away for 12 hours and Adler was asleep for the night. He hadn’t seen my face since 7 a.m. that morning and now he wouldn’t see it again until he woke me up for a middle-of-the-night feeding. As I cried over his sweet sleeping face, the guilt came back with a vengeance. ‘Does he remember me? Does he think I abandoned him? Am I hurting my son by desiring a career outside the home? Am I selfish?'” she admitted to thinking.
Read the full essay here.
