Brad Pitt admits that he spent “years f***ing off,”; but at 49, he tells Esquire magazine that he made a “conscious change”; to turn his life around.

“I’d get so far and then want to do something else. I mean, I’m two credits short of graduating college. Two credits. All I had to do was write a paper. What kind of guy is that?”; the A-list actor recalls of his old life. “For a long time I thought I did too much damage – drug damage. I was a bit of a drifter. A guy who felt he grew up in something of a vacuum and wanted to see things, wanted to be inspired. I followed that other thing.”;

That’s when things changed for Pitt. “It was a conscious change. This was about a decade ago. It was an epiphany – a decision not to squander my opportunities,”; the World War Z star confesses. “It was a feeling of get up. Because otherwise, what’s the point?”;

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Now, as we all know, Pitt is the father of six and engaged to Oscar-winning actress Angelina Jolie. “I always thought that if I wanted to do a family, I wanted to do it big. I wanted there to be chaos in the house. …There’s constant chatter in our house, whether it’s giggling or screaming or crying or banging. I love it. I love it. I love it,”; he gushed over his family. “I hate it when they’re gone. I hate it. Maybe it’s nice to be in a hotel room for a day — “Oh, nice, I can finally read a paper.’ But then, by the next day, I miss that cacophony, all that life.”;

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Adding of his lifestyle, “I have very few friends. I have a handful of close friends and I have my family and I haven’t known life to be any happier. I’m making things. I just haven’t known life to be any happier.”;

For more with Pitt, check out the latest issue of Esquire magazine, on newsstands May 31.

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