Alex Trebek is putting on a brave face.
The “Jeopardy!” host was interviewed Monday “Good Morning America” and discussed his ongoing cancer battle and the toll it’s taken.
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“There was one day a few weeks ago when Jeanie [Trebek’s wife, Jean Trebek] asked me in the morning, ‘How do you feel?’ And I said, ‘I feel like I wanna die.’ It was that bad,” Trebek said. “I apologized to her and explain that it has nothing to do with my love for her or my feelings for her. It just has to do with the fact that I feel like I’m a terrible burden to her. And that bothers me tremendously.”
Choking up, he described his wife Jean, “She’s a saint. She has so much goodness in her that she is always giving out, always putting out to help me get over difficult moments. And there have been some difficult moments. I’m just in awe of the way she handles it.”
As for how he’s been holding up through life and work, Trebek admitted that things aren’t always as easy as he makes them seem.
“I’m good at faking it,” he explained. “There have been tough moments. And I don’t know what it is, but when it’s time to go, it’s time to go. Let’s do it. Get out there, suck it up, make it happen.”
The host, who turns 80 years old on Wednesday, said that “Jeopardy!” has been one of the biggest things keeping him going throughout his ordeal.
“It’s something that I can’t explain intellectually,” he said.” At a gut level, without even thinking about it, it just happens. I suddenly wake up and I’m able to perform and handle the show because I like it. It’s a good job.”
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He also said that his doctor has given him some hope that he will survive a little longer yet.
“My doctor has told me that he is counting on me celebrating two years of — survivorship past the diagnosis of stage 4 pancreatic cancer,” Trebek said. “And that two years happens in February,” said Trebek. “So I expect to be around ‘cause he said I will be around. And I expect to be hosting the show if I am around.”
Trebek revealed he is currently undergoing some experimental treatments.
“They do a blood test to see what my CA 19 numbers are,” he said. “And the CA 19 numbers are an indicator of how your pancreatic cancer is progressing. Eight weeks ago, the numbers were at about 3,500. Now, they’re below 100. So I’m going in the right direction. The doctors have said they have never seen a chart like mine because there are peaks. I said, ‘What do you mean — you don’t — you haven’t — you don’t see that often? What do you usually see?’ They usually see it going up. I’m a bit of an anomaly.”
But even though the treatment appears to be working, Trebek said that if it stops working, he is “not going to go to any extraordinary measures to ensure my survival.
“I’ve said to myself, ‘Hey, you — you better start getting your affairs in order.’ And I know exactly what I need to do, but I have yet to do it. So there’s something in the back of my mind that says, ‘Woah, hold on a second, host. Breathe. Maybe you’re gonna be around for a little while longer.’ And that would be so nice.”