Sarah, who connected with Matt James on one of the first one-on-one dates of the season last week, left the show after sharing she felt compelled to be home with her dad, who has ALS and could have just “weeks” to live. But that wasn’t all that led to her decision. After angering the women by stealing time with Matt on a group date she wasn’t on and subsequently isolating herself from the cast, Sarah told Matt about how she was attacked by allegedly “cruel and malicious” cast mates.
Before heading over to Matt’s place to say goodbye, Sarah had a heart-to-heart with Katie, whose conversation she interrupted on the group date. Though mad at the time, Katie came to check in on Sarah, and told her she didn’t like how some of the women responded to her attempted apology.
“I’ve already made up my mind. I’ve decided I’m going to leave. I can’t do this,” Sarah told Katie. “It’s been a combination of things. It wasn’t just last night.”
“I really believe in the feelings I have for him, but I’m not cut out for this. I just can’t give this my all. All my worst insecurities are coming out. I really have to put my well-being first, and I’m not in a good headspace here,” she continued. “I haven’t really opened up to you about the situation with my dad, but he has a terminal illness, and it’s not like, years or months, it’s like, weeks. So, it’s really weighing on my heart too — time away from him. And I thought I was ready for this, but I have to be true to myself.”
Katie mentioned that her dad died in 2012, so she encouraged Sarah to spend as much time with her father as possible.
“It’s so hard being here, away from him, knowing we don’t know how much time he has,” Sarah added.
She then hopped into a car to see Matt, with Katie informing the other women that she left.
“It’s so hard to explain what the past two days have been like, and I’m just like, so sorry,” she began, sitting down with Matt. “Our connection is amazing, but like, I’ve been processing it, and I’m just doubting everything and if I’m ready and if I can truly do this. And I told you how important family is to me, and being away from them — I think it’s just weighing so hard on me.”
“I just feel like, so alone here, and I was just completely attacked by so many of the women in the house,” she added. And I just feel like I’m not welcome.”
Matt asked Sarah to reveal more about how the women were treating her. “I went downstairs to like, apologize to the women for being in my room all day, and was like, completely attacked. Some of the women in there are just cruel and malicious, and it’s like, really hard for me,” she said.
“I can’t imagine what you’re going through from a standpoint of your family back home and what it’s like to be in the house,” Matt replied, but assured Sarah he wanted her there. “You shared with me your heart, and that meant something to me…. I don’t want to lose you.”
Sarah thanked Matt, but said she made up her mind. “I’ve prayed about this, and I’ve thought about it, and I just felt really called to go home and be with my family. I just don’t think I’m ready for this,” she expressed. “I wish you could see my heart.”
“I feel it,” Matt said, telling Sarah she doesn’t need to apologize.
“It doesn’t mean I’m going to stop thinking about you and praying for your dad,” he continued. “When you’re ready, some guy is going to be extremely lucky, and I’m bummed it’s not me, but I’ve learned so much from you already and what it means to sacrifice and do anything for your family and people you love. And I’m going to miss you.”
Matt walked Sarah to the car, where she broke down in tears.
“That’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done,” she cried. “I do have feelings for him, but I can’t do this. And he sees my heart, and he knows how important family is to me. I think that’s why he let me go, because he sees my heart. This isn’t the best Sarah, and Matt deserves the best. I gave it my all. I just can’t do this. But part of me thinks I’m making a mistake, because he’s so incredible.”
“The Bachelor” airs Mondays at 8 p.m. ET/PT on ABC. Circle back to ET on Tuesday for our interview with Sarah.