The former “Bachelor” star looks back on the split in his new book, The First Time: Finding Myself and Looking for Love on Reality TV.
Revealing that Randolph first approached him with her issues while they were quarantining in her parents’ home following his battle with COVID-19, he writes, “After more than a month of being cooped up in her family’s home, both of us were feeling overwhelmed and smothered and eager to return to our respective apartments where we could enjoy our own space.”
“Before we left, though, she took me aside and told me she was struggling with everything in our relationship and didn’t know what to do. My head spun like one of those characters in a cartoon. What? She was struggling with everything?”
The excerpt, shared exclusively with Us Weekly, continues, “In a calmer moment, I agreed we’d worked through some misfires and miscues lately, little things where we didn’t see exactly eye to eye, but I didn’t realize how much those little things had been impacting her. It was one of those proverbial deaths by a thousand paper cuts. Her eyes were full of tears as she tried to explain, struggling to find the right words and reasons that made sense. None did — at least not to me.”
In the final piece of the excerpt, Underwood adds, “For the next several days, we hung out and returned to normal the best we could considering the circumstances. When we drove back down to Huntington Beach a few days later, I brought up a project we were planning together and got an unexpected response. She said she didn’t know if we should jump into another project together when there was so much uncertainty in our relationship.
“Uncertainty? That hit me hard. Was there a timer on our relationship? What was going on? Were we together or not together? ‘Are we breaking up?’ I asked.”
Underwood and Randolph dated for two years before their relationship ended in mid-April last year.