It’s been four months since the world lost Eddie Van Halen and Valerie Bertinelli is still grieving.

The Food Network host, 60, who was married to the late rocker from 1981 to 2007, chatted with therapist Angie Johnsey during an Instagram Live on Friday.

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“You never like this new normal but that’s what it is,” she began. “It’s about finding a way to survive this new normal… which many people are doing. This whole year unfortunately has been about death and grieving and loss… Too many people have lost too many things.

“It’s just shattering what’s going on.”

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For the “Hot In Cleveland” alum, however, talking about loss helps.

“Talking about grief is the appropriate thing to do. We’re all going through some form of it.”

She later talked about Van Halen directly, “That’s the thing about grief is it’s actually a bit of a blessing because — and I’ll just take my relationship with Ed for the last 40 years — it was a messy relationship. We had some very difficult, very challenging times but we had some beautiful times too.”

Bertinelli and Van Halen share a son together, Wolfgang, 29.

“The lovely thing about grief and the gift that it gives you is that it’s so much easier to remember the beautiful moments than the challenging and the difficult moments that we had with that person,” Bertinelli added. “Those are beautiful things to hold onto and remember the best of whoever you’re grieving.”