Chase Bryant is opening up about his struggles in the past.
In a candid new video posted to his Instagram and during an exclusive interview with People magazine, the country singer opens up for the first time about his 2018 suicide attempt.
Three years ago, Bryant placed a handwritten note on the passenger seat of his truck and headed to a Nashville gas station where he contemplated taking his life.
“I just wanted to make it quick,” he tells People. “I just thought, ‘I can’t do this at my house.’ My parents were staying at my place. I couldn’t let them see that.”
“At that moment, I begged for somebody to listen and I begged for somebody to just come down and help me,” he remembers. “I just screamed out the word ‘sorry’ as loud as I could.”
It was fate that ultimately saved Bryant.
“So, when I looked at it at that moment, it was like, life’s too short, don’t make it any shorter,” he says. “It ain’t worth it. We all have something to be thankful for, right? Looking back at it now, it’s so weird. You’re so dark and then all of a sudden you’re like, ‘OK, I got to get my s— right so I can help somebody else.'”
In the emotional video posted to his Instagram, Bryant explains: “I was a very confused individual. I was very cocky, I was very arrogant, I was sick, very sick. I would look at myself in the mirror and I saw somebody that I didn’t know and that led me down a pretty dark hole for a really long time.”
Bryant released his self-titled EP in 2014 and earned success with his hits “A Little Bit of You” and “Take It on Back”, which was when things “started to change” for him.
“I want to say it was right after ‘A Little Bit of You’, which would have been, God, probably 2016,” he says. “That was when things just sort of started to change for me, and I could feel that change coming on. And I think it was because I was having success as somebody that I really wasn’t.”
Bryant was living what looked to be a country singer’s dream, touring with superstars such as Tim McGraw and Brantley Gilbert, but he admits: “I was chasing success… I wasn’t chasing happiness.”
“I was trying to be something I wasn’t. I was just being who they told me to be. I was doing what they told me to do, and that was somewhat easy at the time because everybody was filling me with this gratification, and I never really had had that from anybody. I never felt that feeling.”
Following his 2018 suicide attempt, Bryant entered a psychiatric and substance abuse centre in Franklin, Tennessee, where he got the treatment he needed.
The singer is now preparing for the release of his new album Upbringing and hopes to help others who are going through a similar struggle that he once did.
“When I think about it, I want to be that one empty chamber for somebody,” he tells People. “I want to be that one shot of fulfillment or hope. I hope that this takes that bullet out of somebody’s life. I hope this takes it away. Maybe somebody sees this, somebody that’s going through something and says, ‘You know what? There is hope,’ because there really is.”
If you or someone you know is in crisis and needs help, resources are available. In case of an emergency, please call 911 for immediate help.
The Canadian Association for Suicide Prevention, Depression Hurts and Kids Help Phone 1-800-668-6868 all offer ways of getting help if you, or someone you know, may be suffering from mental health issues.