“The Bachelor” star Rachael Kirkconnell is speaking after hitting “rock bottom” due to the racism controversy.
On the finale of Matt James’ season of the show, James fell for Kirkconnell, but by the time “After the Final Rose” aired, the two had called it quits.
Their breakup came after a TikTok user accused Kirkconnell of previously bullying her for dating Black men. Then, another user accused her of liking racist photos. Pics also surfaced of her at an Old South plantation-themed party while in college. Kirkconnell has since apologized and asked people to stop defending her actions.
Kirkconnell appeared on From Privilege to Progress’s “Unscripted Live” earlier this week, where she spoke about the days leading up to her apology.
She told co-hosts Michelle Saahene and Melissa DePino, “I had a lot of people in my ear saying, ‘You’ll have your time. Don’t make it worse. You’ll have your time to speak. We’ll give you a platform. Just wait it out.’
“I felt pressure to just keep it all in, to wait, to stay silent,” Kirkconnell added.
Kirkconnell eventually apologized in an Instagram post.
She continued, “I finally decided to put that statement out and then obviously that wasn’t enough because it’s not actually a conversation.
“Anyone could have written that statement, which a lot of people had thought. I didn’t even have any sort of representation at that point. People were like, ‘Wow, her publicist did great with this.’ That’s when I was like, ‘It’s not enough.'”
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Kirkconnell explained how her post came amid issues with her and James’ relationship.
“That was our breaking point at that point for both of us and that’s when we had split up right towards the end of February and that same week, I was like I have nothing left to lose at this point so that’s when I just decided to post an IGTV of me just speaking,” the reality TV star shared. “I have to get my voice out there and put my face out there.”
Despite insisting some of the headlines were “twisted,” Kirkconnell said of the resurfaced photos: “That dress and the history of that formal was racist and I was completely ignorant to that and I needed to be held accountable for that.
“I wanted to apologize and for some people, that won’t be enough, and I completely understand that,” she added. “People are more than entitled not to forgive me, but that was my rock bottom. I had lost everything.”
As Kirkconnell and James are back together, she has been trying to find “some normalcy” in her life over the past few months.
“I’ve learned so much and I try to tell myself, ‘You do have this platform and you could make a difference. I have a platform to pave the way for people to find those resources. I have a platform to amplify those resources.'”
