Valerie Bertinelli is proving herself to be “raw and vulnerable” in her new memoir. The actress and television host talks about her heartbreaking goodbye to late ex-husband Eddie Van Halen and her separation from second husband Tom Vitale.

Bertinelli joined the “Today” show’s Hoda Kotb for a candid conversation during which she admitted that she and Van Halen went through some hard times as a young, married couple. However, she’s glad they were able to put their past behind them before the legendary rock star lost his life to cancer in October 2020.

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“We went through a lot of hell as well,” Bertinelli said during Tuesday’s episode. “We weren’t really good to each other at a lot of points in our lives because we met so young and were very immature. But I’m so happy that we were able to come to a beautiful place by the end of his life. I just wish he were still here.”

Bertinelli, 61, recalled the heart-wrenching final moments with Van Halen, her husband from 1981 to 2007, in her new book Enough Already: Learning to Love the Way I Am Today, released today. She and their son Wolfgang, 30, were by the guitarist’s side.

“’I love you’ are the last words Ed says to Wolfie and me and they are the last words we say to him before he stops breathing,” Bertinelli wrote in her memoir.

The couple remained close despite their divorce.

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“I think soulmates, I think we have more than just one. I think I feel like Wolfie is a soulmate of mine,” Bertinelli told Kotb. “When I think of soulmate, I think of souls that come here to experience this life on Earth together again and get to a higher place. I definitely know that was part of Ed, I loved his soul deeply.”

Bertinelli’s memoir shares her path to acceptance and openness, as she continues to work on her own mental and physical well-being.

“I didn’t intend to write a book with all this grief in it. It was about joy and if I left that part out it wouldn’t show you the path to joy and how to find that even through the depths of the biggest grief you can feel… I wanted to express about love and how love is just so important to remember even when you are going through all of the pain.”

The former “One Day at a Time” star also opened up about the end of her second marriage to Vitale. In November, she filed for legal separation from her husband of 11 years.

“It kind of pushes you into a place. I am a big old procrastinator I put things off until the last minute,” Bertinelli admitted. “I want to be gentle and caring and not just rip off a Band-Aid. I think there is definitely power and peace in changing your narrative and the way you look at life. When I change the way I look at life and stop beating myself up most of the time it reaches in there and there is power in that and peace.”

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Bertinelli also joined Hollywood in mourning the loss of the beloved Betty White, who died last month at 99. The actor starred with White in the hit TV Land sitcom “Hot in Cleveland” that ran from 2010 to 2015.

“She was magical. I mean, there is no other way to explain that lovely woman, and she is the one that taught me so much about gratitude,” she said. “Betty walked in gratitude and was grateful for every moment in life and everything that happened to her. I say this all the time because it’s so true, she glowed. She was otherworldly. She was an angel here on Earth, for sure, and I am actually, as sad as I am, we don’t get to be with her, I am so happy she is with Allen [Ludden] right now.”